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06 Nov

Hold Harmless

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The mystery of whispers that speak one way and then re-whisper to speak another. Had been asked to write my reflections on a Mary Oliver poem. The whisper was so gentle as I gazed into the eyes of the deer. Days later, gazing into different eyes of discordant and broken hearts, the whisper returned. And so, it seemed fitting to leave it here. Perhaps it will turn yet again and whisper to you.

“The Place I Want to Get Back To” by Mary Oliver

 

The place I want to get back to
is where
in the pinewoods
in the moments between
the darkness
and first light
two deer
came walking down the hill
and when they saw me
they said to each other, okay,
this one is okay,
let’s see who she is
and why she is sitting
on the ground like that,
so quiet, as if
asleep, or in a dream,
but, anyway, harmless;
and so they came
on their slender legs
and gazed upon me
not unlike the way
I go out to the dunes and look
and look and look
into the faces of the flowers;
and then one of them leaned forward
and nuzzled my hand, and what can my life
bring to me that could exceed
that brief moment?
For twenty years
I have gone every day to the same woods,
not waiting, exactly, just lingering.
Such gifts, bestowed,
can’t be repeated.
If you want to talk about this
come to visit. I live in the house
near the corner, which I have named
Gratitude.

Mary Oliver
Book: Thirst (Beacon Press, 2006)

 

Nature is my sanctuary. So many wordless conversations I have had with nature’s creatures. The stillness of nature’s creatures deciding I am harmless makes my heart sing. “Harmless” is an experience I carry inward as I meditate and walk in daily life. Metta is an action. More importantly, metta is a way of being, who we are. When nature’s creatures perceive me as “harmless” I have become metta. When I go through the day, I try to hold that same sense of presence and being. Would the one facing me, driving next to me, etc. perceive me as “harmless” and dare to touch my hand? Such moments are grace.

They “gazed upon me not unlike the way I go out to the dunes and look and look and look into the faces of the flowers” reminds me to look into the eyes of others. Do we not all fix our gazes longing to find the gentleness of flowers? Who will I pass today looking for gentleness and harmlessness? Will they find their longing returned in my gaze?

“What can my life bring to me that could exceed that brief moment?” MO says she has gone for years to that spot and only that one brief moment has been gifted. A perfect reminder to not forsake precious moments of grace always looking for newest and greatest.

“If you want to talk about this come to visit.” We are companions on this journey. We so quickly tell others our trials. How often do we share moments of grace instead of negativity? To welcome others to the ancient circle of sharing the mystery and awe of life.

“I live in the house near the corner, which I have named Gratitude.  Each day is a moment of grace. May my shelter of house and the shelter of heart never cease to whisper, gratitude as I awake and open the gift of today. “What can my life bring to me that could exceed that brief moment.”

 

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