Yes I remember 15 years ago today. I remember the words I spoke to my employees who were shaken as phone calls to co-workers, who were friends, were shattered with screams and sounds no one should hear- or they experience. I remember screaming “Chris!” in the phone as the screaming went silent. Every hour we were talking to co-workers, who were friends, in their offices in the World Trade Center’s twin towers. Having traveled there I knew the views, the elevators that took me into the clouds.

Yes I remember 15 years ago today. Like the image of Fisher’s Peak in my rear view mirror, it has rooted me for 15 years. As have all the traumas in my life. That one was epic. All traumas are epic. All traumas are horrific. All traumas leave unresolved the questions of how and why. All traumas leave loss and dissociation. All traumas violate every sense in our bodies, hearts, and minds. That’s the definition of trauma.

Yes I remember 15 years ago today. But remembrance and trauma beg and plead the question…what now? As beautiful and grounding as Fisher’s Peak is, I cannot drive looking only at rear view mirror. If I do, another trauma will ensue. Who have I become since? Who will I become hence? How will that presence shape, comfort, guide, and welcome all around me? My city? My state? My country? The world? The earth? Those living a similar 9/11 every moment and every day?

Yes I remember 15 years ago today. May we all bow in remembrance. May we all vow to live, be, love, and dispel the screaming with peace and compassion. May we all choose to live in that precious gap of remembrance that keeps its eye on the future. On now. May what we lost seed what we can gain if we but ask, what now? The healing balm, the only healing trauma knows.

Namaste….Shalom