A most gentle morning beginning errands and preparations for heavy snow. The ice had sculpted feather like designs on the windshield. I giggled to see the artwork and delicate ice drawings. I moved through the morning with mindful gentle intention as I kept the ice drawings in my mind.

A chance desire to pour another cup of coffee disrupted the gentleness. Reaching for the coffee pot I looked out the window. A hawk had taken one of my little pigeon friends. As the hawk stood atop the crumpled pigeon, I witnessed a last wave and flutter of his wing. The hawk took off carrying my little friend. A hawk, no different than the ones that make me laugh in delight and give thanks to see, when I am at Maxwell Wildlife Sanctuary. They too are my friends. Only, the hawks do no dance around my feet as I put seed on the ground. I tried to process the contrast and sadness of an image that lasted only a few seconds. If I had paused my desire for a cup of coffee just a few seconds I never would have known. And perhaps, I thought, that was the whisper.

“Today I say good-bye. After I die, don’t mourn me in the usual manner of the world. …don’t wear mourning clothes. …Act instead as though I were still in the world, sitting upright, not moving, not resting, not coming or going, …just in solitary peace. This is the Great Way. After I die, just go on practicing as before, as though I were still here. Otherwise it would be as though my life here as abbot was meaningless.” ~ Hui-Neng

I remembered the wave of the pigeon’s wing. Not an image my little heart bears with ease. But as Hui-Neng said, I will not allow his leaving to be meaningless. To honor his brief simple life and the joy he and the others give me. One cannot choose only the beautiful moments in life. Not an image my little heart bears with ease. But one it bears with grace. His departure did not go unnoticed. Nor will it be meaningless. And to both hawk and pigeon, Namaste. Ice sculptures of feathers that have since melted but I still see the beauty.